Too many times, most of the time, I concentrate on all the things I do wrong, constantly bringing up my faults, imperfections. I remind myself I can be better.
Tonight it's one of those nights.
Depression is covering my thoughts, making life once again so blurry and at moments I feel like my pain is unbearable. It is a monster that enter my mind, and dwells there. It doesn't leave until it gets the best of me and it see me broken down in a corner. Then when IT is satisfy and IT will leave me there, alone, crying for something I can't fix, control, or sometimes even remember.
In my deepest moments I turned myself to Church talks to find some relief.
Tonight I came a cross this, which conforted me:
"Some of you sisters may feel inadequate because you can't seem to do all you want to do. Motherhood and parenting are most challenging roles. You also have Church callings that you fulfill so capably and conscientiously...In general you noble sisters are doing a much better job of holding it all together and making it work than you realize. May I suggest that you take your challenges one day at a time. Do the best you can. Look at everything through the lens of eternity. If you will do this, life will take on a different perspective."
James E. Faust
One day at the time.
The road to perfection is achieved by doing the very best I (you) can every day.
I am grateful for the knowledge I have of my Father in Heaven. It brings me peace to know, that HE KNOWS. I feel like he is holding my hand through this hard path and he is healing my heart. Today more than yesterday. Tomorrow we will see.
Thank you for your hugs and love today. It was wonderful to wake up and have you come and snuggle with me.
You smell like Heaven!
Love you,
MAMMA
Friday, September 17, 2010
Friday, September 10, 2010
Today It was a Good Day
Nothing really special happen today..
We woke up all three and the big bed. Giacomo came as usual around 2am. Neve at about 4 am crying about a bad dream. It was something about a flag with eyes...not sure, but you talked about it all day.
We took a shower together..and we were late for a lunch meeting. However, we started singing "BELLA"...we sang loud, messed up the words, and laughed like crazy...I remember smelling your hair and thinking that I wish that moment lasted forever..of course until Neve peed on my foot...and then we laughed again.
I love days were I get to snuggle and love you.
I love being a your mom. Thank you for allow me to make mistake, being a bad mood, and tired..and still love me like I am the best mother in the world!!
Today it was a good day!
Love you, Mamma
We woke up all three and the big bed. Giacomo came as usual around 2am. Neve at about 4 am crying about a bad dream. It was something about a flag with eyes...not sure, but you talked about it all day.
We took a shower together..and we were late for a lunch meeting. However, we started singing "BELLA"...we sang loud, messed up the words, and laughed like crazy...I remember smelling your hair and thinking that I wish that moment lasted forever..of course until Neve peed on my foot...and then we laughed again.
I love days were I get to snuggle and love you.
I love being a your mom. Thank you for allow me to make mistake, being a bad mood, and tired..and still love me like I am the best mother in the world!!
Today it was a good day!
Love you, Mamma
Sunday, September 5, 2010
Serendipity?
ser·en·dip·i·ty /ˌsɛrənˈdɪpɪti/ Show Spelled[ser-uhn-dip-i-tee] Show IPA
–noun
1. an aptitude for making desirable discoveries by accident.
Since I was a little girl my dad talked about Destiny and the power that "universal" elements have in our lives and how they shape our future.
As I grow up and made my own discoveries that power has been very real in my life, but with a slight twist: I now call it the Power of God. I love to see how things came together and play in our lives for good.
I don't considere myself a blogger or a good writer, so I'm not planning to make this a "big deal" blog. It will be something I write for my kids. Kind of like a legacy. It will be about nothing and everything at the same time.
There will not be a specific order..it is just what it is in my mind, life, and how it is effecting me and others.
So to my kids:
I dedicate this blog to you. I love you. You are my everything. You inspire me to be a better woman, mother, wife, friend. You are sweet, loving, funny, stubborn and absolutly adorable. I thank God for sending you to me!
Love You Forever, La Mamma
–noun
1. an aptitude for making desirable discoveries by accident.
Since I was a little girl my dad talked about Destiny and the power that "universal" elements have in our lives and how they shape our future.
As I grow up and made my own discoveries that power has been very real in my life, but with a slight twist: I now call it the Power of God. I love to see how things came together and play in our lives for good.
I don't considere myself a blogger or a good writer, so I'm not planning to make this a "big deal" blog. It will be something I write for my kids. Kind of like a legacy. It will be about nothing and everything at the same time.
There will not be a specific order..it is just what it is in my mind, life, and how it is effecting me and others.
So to my kids:
I dedicate this blog to you. I love you. You are my everything. You inspire me to be a better woman, mother, wife, friend. You are sweet, loving, funny, stubborn and absolutly adorable. I thank God for sending you to me!
Love You Forever, La Mamma
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